August 23, 2012

Home

As our days in San Francisco wind down, I have to admit that I'm freaking out a little bit. I can hardly fathom the thought that we're heading out in just 10 days to begin our adventure. I'm completely preoccupied with thoughts of what the next year of my life will be like because it's right around the corner and I have no idea what to expect.

ooh la la!
I'm in the process of packing our apartment up and it's really hitting me - I'm giving up the concept of "home" for more than a year. And that's scary.

The other day, I was making coffee. Almost every morning, I have coffee from the same coffee mug. I love these mugs. They're Ittala's Taika mug in white. Every day, using this coffee mug makes me happy. When I use that mug, it gives me the smallest feeling of comfort and joy. I don't get that feeling with my dinner plates or my couch cushions or many other "things" in our apartment. But I love these coffee mugs. Every time I get one down, I think, "I'm so glad I bought these mugs." And that moment gives me the smallest bit of joy and comfort every day. Recently, it occurred to me that I would be losing that small comfort (and tons of others) for a year. I told Tom about this and he said, "You're going to miss A COFFEE CUP while we're on the trip of a lifetime?" And I said, "Of course not! If you ever hear me actually talking about how much I miss the coffee cup, smack me in the face. What I WILL miss, though, are those small moments of comfort." What if I don't feel like me for an entire year?

I just can't believe that we're leaving in 10 days. You hear people say, all the time, that something is "surreal," and I've said that a number of times in my life also, but I don't think I've ever meant it as much as I do now. I can honestly say that this is a truly bizarre feeling. I'm so excited/nervous/sad/happy and, honestly, it's giving me indigestion. Pile that onto the HUGE list of things I have to do and, well, I've had my share of freak out moments this past week.

Don't get me wrong - I'm still super excited. And I'm, in no way, regretting this decision. But it's almost Go Time and the reality is intense. And the unknown is scary. 



6 comments:

  1. Seems all normal feelings for me. Don't overthink it. It's an adventure you're starting and you are to feel so many emotions during your travel. Yes, I can assure you'll miss your mug. and pillow, and sofa and all the comforts from home we usually neglect. As one friend once told me, travelling is also an appreciation of home.
    BUT you'll also realize how little one needs to live and how comfortable you can find yourself in distant places you had no idea you would ever go.
    Oh, it's gonna be great (even if some moments won't be so great)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for reading, Sara, and thanks for the advice! I am so excited for this adventure and it's good to be reminded of the good when I have freak outs! Fortunately, my husband and I have taken turns freaking out, but haven't freaked out at the same time yet! :)

      Delete
  2. Not sure if you read much by Derek Sivers but he's got a good post that basically says "do whatever scares you." cause if you aren't doing those things then you aren't on the right track.

    You are on the right track.

    ref: http://sivers.org/scares-excites-do-it

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Peter - I'm not familiar with Derek Sivers, but I love that idea, so I'll check him out. Thanks for sharing! I know we're on the right track, but it's nice to be reminded. Tom is still working these last few days before we leave, so I don't think it's quite hit him yet...because I'm the one packing up the apartment and making the final preparations. We're just 9 days from Go Time now!

      Delete
  3. Hi Tom and Stephanie,

    Your friend Lauren told us very briefly about you and your adventure and suggested I contact you. What Lauren didn't know from our brief meeting is the incredible similarity here...we also are soon to be giving up our home and hitting the road for a time period unknown as of now. Maybe a few months, maybe a few years. But that was not even mentioned in our conversation with her, so I'm still in a surprised state of mind. You have a BEAUTIFUL blog. We also started one, but yours is an inspiration. So back to what Lauren wanted me to contact you about...could you email me at lorriek496@gmail.com. She (and I) think you will be quite interested. Hope to hear from you soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Lorrie - I'm so glad you found our blog! I just emailed you and can't wait to hear back!

      Delete